Nothing To See Here

After seeing Kurt Cobain About A Son, I congratulated Michael and let him know I was going to be writing a review of the film. He told me to let him know if I had any questions, so I emailed him a few.
What was the motivating factor in bringing the tapes out? You touched on how you and AJ had dinner and basically decided to do it, but could you explain how it all happened?

The motivation for Kurt to cooperate with my book in the first place was that he figured that being candid was a lot better than all the speculation, untruths and distortions which had been told about him in the press. He wanted people to remember that he was a real person, with feelings and that there had been very awful consequences to some of the things that had been written about him and Courtney, i.e., losing custody of their child. Ten years after his death, Kurt had once again been dehumanized, turned into an icon instead of a person. So it was time to try to correct that.

How hands-on were you in making the film?

The biggest task I had was helping to choose the soundbites that comprise the film. Luckily, AJ and I chose almost identical passages, so there wasn’t too much haggling. l did manage to get him to use the bits about how flies loved to hassle Kurt and about how turtles are vulnerable. I also chose most of the artists and songs used in the soundtrack. And I just generally lobbied for sticking with the original approach we had devised; the movie turned out exactly as we’d envisioned it, only way better.

Going back to those tapes, which you hadn’t listened to for several years, had to be emotional. Hell, it was emotional for me to listen. Could you explain how the process made you feel? Did you hear anything new?

It wasn’t emotional in the sense of being upset. It was emotional in that it made me happy to remember the real Kurt, rather than his death and its aftermath. I didn’t hear anything new, since I’d personally transcribed those tapes and still recalled pretty much everything on them. One thing I did hear anew was the fact that Bruce Springsteen is playing in the background of a lot of the soundbites. Kurt wasn’t a Springsteen fan so I have no explanation for why that happened.

I wrote to a friend who’s also a big Nirvana fan that this film is important for people to see. I felt like it humanized Kurt more than anything I had ever seen or read before. Did you feel like it was important for people to see him in this light? Why?

Maybe if people see this movie, they’ll realize that their icons are actual people, who hurt and cry and laugh and play just like everybody else. It might help people have a healthier relationship with their celebrities, which I think is good for everybody involved. We can’t bring Kurt back, but maybe we can learn from our mistakes, so something like that doesn’t happen again.

What were you able to learn about yourself through your conversations with Kurt?

Kurt and Courtney considered me a stable, responsible person. I hadn’t ever really thought of myself like that. It was enlightening.

I’m not going to bore you with how long this one took. Actually, yes I will. It took me a long time. I didn’t have enough songs, then I had too many, then the hip-hop that I wanted to include just wasn’t working. Whatever. Strip Music is one of the worst band names and I almost didn’t even listen to them because of it. Boy, am I happy I did. I was a little late to the Cold War Kids party. I just didn’t really get around to listening to them even though a trusted co-worker wouldn’t shut the fuck up about them. Speaking of hot band names, The Morning After Girls rock. Simple as that. Uh oh, the new Apples In Stereo leaked. You’re gain. I’ll still buy the record and so will you (unless you’re name is Shayna). I saw Chin Up Chin Up open for The Kooks and they were awesome. Their album left something to be desired, but I’ll spend some more time with it. I have no idea who The Blow are, but I love them and their album is fantastic poppy electro stuff. Yum. Magic Number have a new album have a new one coming. I was so sick of their last one, but the new material is refreshing as hell. You’re totally looking forward to the new Shins album. It’s ok to like them and Garden State. Wow, The Bees don’t sound as retro as they did on the last one. I’m still a fan. Charlotte is related to Serge, but you’d never know by listening to the music. No, not at all. No influence there. Nope. None. It’s so lovely and I’ve listened to it at least 50 times. Not that I need to justify putting a Nirvana song on my mix, but there’s a story behind this one. Dave Grohl started playing this one on the Foo Fighters’ acoustic tour. It’s actually all him on the track as well, but was released as a b-side on the “Heart-Shaped Box” single. It’s a really pretty song. Another singer-songwriter named Damien. He’s good though. I’m new to Radical Face. Eberg was an emusic discovery when I downloaded Home Video. I’ve been a fan of Squarepusher for a long time. I reckon most of you will skip this track because it can grate a little. I’ll admit it. Earlimart is one of those bands that I wish would just fucking rock out a little more than they do. When they write songs like this track, I can’t get enough. Oxford Collapse, I hardly know thee.

01 Sugar And Lime – Strip Music
02 Hang Me Up To Dry – Cold War Kids
03 Always Mine – The Morning After Girls
04 Skyway – The Apples In Stereo
05 Water Planes in Snow – Chin Up Chin Up
06 Parentheses – The Blow
07 Take A Chance – Magic Numbers
08 Phantom Limb – The Shins
09 Imaginary Girl – The Bees
10 The Song That We Sing – Charlotte Gainsbourg
11 Marigold – Nirvana
12 Hoquiam – Damien Jurado
13 Welcome Home, Son – Radical Face
14 I’m Moving To Wales – Eberg
15 Planetarium – Squarepusher
16 Don’t Take My Sunshine Away – Sparklehorse
17 Everybody Knows Everybody – Earlimart
18 Loser City – Oxford Collapse

* If you are the copyright holder of any of the posted MP3s and would like them taken down, please drop me a note and I will happily comply.

I emailed Michael Azerrad on August 23 of this year. It was the day I found out Kurt Cobain About A Son had not only been made, but was going to have its first festival screening. In the email I expressed my excitement about the film, as I’ve been a fan of Nirvana for many years. I’ve also been an admirer of Michael’s work, especially Come As You Are: The Story of Nirvana. It was that book, and later Charles Cross’ book Heavier Than Heaven: A Biography of Kurt Cobain, that really got me interested in Kurt’s life. After reading as much as I had about Kurt and Nirvana, I felt like I knew quite a bit about his life. While there were certainly some extraordinary parts, he was just a guy who played in a band that wrote some of the best songs I’ve ever heard. Nirvana’s music spoke to me in a way that no other band had been able to do. It was the raw emotion, the sentimentality and the brilliant instrumentation. It spoke to me, and I wasn’t alone.

Kurt Cobain About A Son is an important film for people to see, not only because it shows Kurt simply as a young man, but also redefines what a documentary can be. It’s one of the most unique, if not the most unique documentaries I’ve ever seen. It’s not a documentary on Nirvana, it doesn’t contain any Nirvana music, it has almost no photos of Nirvana (or Kurt) except at the very end and contains little discussion of the music. The film is an intensely emotional look at Kurt’s life in his own words. Those words were drawn from 25 hours of taped conversations between Kurt and Michael Azerrad. The visuals were comprised of imagery from Aberdeen, Olympia and Seattle. These were not only places where Kurt had lived, but marked three distinct points in his life and the film. Each place had a particular feel. Whether it was different film, a richer or duller color palette, the emotion in the visuals and hearing Kurt’s voice was stunning.

He talked about everything from first getting together with Krist in high school, to living with Dave in a depressingly small apartment, to meeting Courtney for the first time to his thoughts on drugs, family and life. It’s actually difficult for me to recall many specifics, but there were definitely some laughs and other times I found myself angry for what a contradictory asshole he could be. I remember feeling the same when I was reading the books and articles sometimes. The candor and honesty in Kurt’s conversation was amazing, no doubt a reflection of the trust he had for Michael. During one particular point in the interview Kurt is expressing his utter hatred and disgust for journalists. He thinks they are the scum of the earth and says as much. In a split second of awkwardness as Kurt realizes he’s talking to a journalist, he assures Michael that he’s not part of the 99% to which he’s referring. It spoke to the friendship between them. That friendship became more apparent as the film progressed and Kurt was revealing more.

Throughout the film I had moments where I had to consciously breathe. I didn’t want to hear or see anything else. The Director, AJ Schnack was able to keenly illustrate the importance of “sense of place,” which he felt was particularly important. He explained, “In creating the visuals, I didn’t want to adhere to anyone’s idea of what “grunge” might look like – either in the cinematography or the editing. I wanted a classic structure – three acts, an overture and two interludes – with composed, dream-like imagery. That imagery, along with the I’ve-been-up-all-night tone of Kurt’s conversation, was intoxicating and haunting at times. The visuals never distracted you from the story. It was like looking out the window of slow-moving bus while someone whispered a story in one ear while a stark soundtrack played in the other. Many times, I felt like I was the only person sitting in the theater.

In much the same way the imagery helped tell the story, the music marked points and provided a sonic foundation that supported the film. Whether it was carefully chosen songs that had direct significance to Kurt such as Queen’s “It’s Late,” Big Black’s “Kerosene,” The Vaselines’ “Son of a Gun,” Scratch Acid’s “Owner’s Lament,” David Bowie’s “The Man Who Sold The World” or the gorgeous score by Steve Fisk and Ben Gibbard, music was important to this story. After all, it was Kurt’s story.

Whether you’re a causal or die-hard Nirvana fan, this film will appeal to you. It tells a tragic story through Kurt’s own words, dreamy visuals and music. There are moments where you’ll laugh, feel anger and certainly sadness. Even though you know how the story ends, you’ll find yourself hoping otherwise. It’s the story of Kurt Cobain’s life, but more than that it’s the story about a fellow human being that struggled with depression and was never able to find true happiness inside of himself.

A special note of gratitude to Michael Azerrad and Anne Stulz for making sure I was able to see the film.